Most of the time, during therapy, consciously or not, my inner child comes out. The children I work with can sense this, and often they connect with it to communicate their needs. When a session begins, I usually have a plan for the day that balances the parents’ requests with the child’s needs. However, everything can change the moment the child enters the room and I sense a certain intense state from them, completely reshaping my plan.

A recent example happened with an eight-year-old child diagnosed with ASD and non-verbal. The session began normally, and we started the planned activity. About halfway through, I felt I was losing his attention—although he remained technically engaged, he seemed absent. I switched activities, but the same thing happened. I decided to stop everything and create a new plan in a few minutes.

While I was thinking of the new plan, I noticed him sitting on the couch, staring off with a melancholic posture. I approached, gently stroked his head, and sat beside him. When I stopped playing with his hair to continue planning on my phone, he took the phone from me and placed it on the table. With his other hand, he grabbed my shirt, exhaled sharply as he leaned into me, and rested his head on my shoulder, clasping his hands around mine like a little plush toy before bedtime.

When our eyes met, I could read in his gaze a need for emotional relaxation through my presence, and a desire for a few moments of pure, authentic connection. This allowed my inner child to emerge fully so I could ensure he felt safe, understood, and loved in that moment. After about fifteen minutes of deep emotional connection, he got up, sat at the table, and wanted to resume the initial activity with joy. In his eyes, I could read: “Thank you for understanding me.”

In that moment, the adult in me connected with my inner child and allowed it to flow freely, giving the little boy in front of me the full emotional spectrum he needed.

At the end of the session, I shared this moment with the parent, who was happy that I had understood and communicated with him so effectively.

Gabriel Ariasu